The Long and Short of It

We buried that turtle in the back yard next to Gil, the pet goldfish. We didn't name him because he wasn't ours and he was dead when we found him, but we marked his final resting place with a glossy rock I found at the beach.

"I hate those fucking kids." he said.

"I know. I hate their parents. They've really fucked up." I said.

We sat in quiet agreement for some time while we payed our respects. We gave the creature our mental apologies on behalf of our species and the mistakes we can't help ourselves from making.

Then we rallied for a drink.

Leaving the sunlight outside to wear itself out, we stepped into the corner bar again.

"How old do you think that turtle was?"

"I dunno. How old do turtles usually live to be?"

"I don't know."

"He was probably a few months old, born in the spring, you know?"

"Is a few months long enough for a turtle to have a wife and kids?"

"Maybe it was the wife."

"Maybe. Do you think she had kids?"

"Probably not. It's not spring yet, you know?"

"Right." He paused, "Think she was pregnant? God! That's awful! Those little bastards."

"Turtles lay eggs, like chickens. They don't get pregnant."

"Right. They're still bastards."

"Don't you think its at all strange that we're more sympathetic to a dead six month old turtle than we are to living human children that are lacking some significant guidance?"

"They're cruel."

"I know. That's my point. Isn't their present, leave alone their future, so much more tragic than the death of one middle aged reptile?"

"Amphibian."

"Whatever." I'm met with silence while he drinks his beer. He's thinking. After a minute he answers.

"Logically that makes sense, yes. Intellectually, I agree with you. You're right. The value of a human life should be worth more. The quality of that life has more bearing, moralistically, than the entire existence of one simple turtle. In the hierarchy of the animal kingdom humans reign supreme. We have emotion, rational thought, the ability to to learn and grow and develop as a society. Hell! We have fucking opposable thumbs! But emotionally? Fuck those kids. They're bastards. They're cruel. They killed a small being unequipped to defend itself. They misused their rights and responsibilities as more evolved beings. Its disgusting."

"It is disgusting."

"They're bastards."

"They're only gonna get older."

"I know."

"Let's have a shot."

"Yes. Let's."